Anirban Lahiri seeks peace through silence

Can you imagine going 10 days without speaking? No? Well, Anirban Lahiri can. In fact, he’s done it four times now, most recently this past summer at a meditation retreat in Shelburne, Massachusetts. “It’s actually not that hard,â€� he says. The first step is to get rid of all distractions. Cell phones aren’t allowed while you’re at the center. Neither are TVs or computers. You’re not even allowed to read a book. “When you go into an environment where no one around you is distracted, you don’t feel that urge either,â€� Lahiri explains.   “Everyone is there for a focus. Everyone is there to try and better themselves, find a calm state of mind. So, I think because of that environment, it actually makes it easier.â€� But there comes a point, Lahiri says, about seven or eight days into the retreat, when the sense of calm is almost overwhelming. “It’s almost like, oh, my god, I’ve got to start talking again,â€� he says with a smile. “I don’t want to do this. I am so happy right now. So peaceful. I just want to stay within myself. So, it’s strange. You almost undergo a metamorphosis from start to finish.  “But it’s not just you, it’s everyone around you.â€� Lahiri, who has practiced Vipassana meditation for the last 13 years, calls the experience a “mental cleanse.â€� There were 120 people at the retreat held at the Vipassana Meditation Center — Dhamma Dhara, which is the largest and oldest facility outside of Lahiri’s native India. The session began the week after the 30-year-old tied for second at the Memorial Tournament. While he was at the center, many of his peers were playing in the U.S. Open. Lahiri hadn’t qualified but he isn’t sure he would have played at Erin Hills even if he had. “I was just not in a happy place,â€� Lahiri explains. “I have a lot of good things going in my life, but I wasn’t happy. That is the first sign that you need to get a fresh perspective on things.â€� So he did. The retreat featured structured classes as well as group meditation lasting at least three hours a day — and often longer. “When you think about 120 people meditating simultaneously, it’s some really nice energy,â€� Lahiri says. The retreat participants live at the center and each day eat their meals together, although in complete silence. “You just hear scraping and spoons on plates,â€� Lahiri says. Free time, not surprisingly, is often spent communing with nature.  Walks in the woods near the Vermont border. Sitting on the banks of a nearby stream.   “It’s fantastic,â€� Lahiri says. “I was actually blown away with how nice that place is.â€� Lahiri was 17 years old when he first started to meditate. He was drawn to Vipassana, which has been taught for 2,500 years, when he saw the impact the practice had on the lives of his mother and father. “I saw both of them in a much better place afterwards,â€� Lahiri says.  “Just more peaceful, definitely more calm, just living a wholesome life. I was like, hey, if it helps them to find more calmness and peace, this might help my golf.â€� As it turned out, though, meditation helped every aspect of Lahiri’s life – not just his golf game. A golfer since he was 8, Lahiri feels he now has more control over his emotions, the highs and the lows, and he better understands the path to conformity and balance. “I came out of that first course saying, oh, my god, this has got nothing to do with golf,â€� he reports. “This is has got everything to do with life, everything to do with how I approach everything.  “If you are a golfer then it applies to golf.  If you sit at a desk for eight hours a day, it applies to that. If you’re a parent, it applies to your interpersonal relationships with your kids. It applies to everything.â€� Granted, there are still times when Lahiri, who recently played in his second Presidents Cup, is hard on himself – dwelling on the bogeys rather than moving forward to the next shot with a clean slate. He  knows he can be his own worst enemy. “But I expect better from myself. I know I can do better,â€� Lahiri says. “Sometimes, like my coach says, my wife says, my dad says, just smile and accept the mistake. It’s okay to play bad sometimes, hit a bad shot or whatever it is and just accept it.  “That’s what the meditation helps me to understand and practice on an everyday basis.â€� Lahiri says he tries to meditate three or four times a week for about  an hour each time. Just not right after he’s had a bad round. “See, the thing is, if you are really, really agitated then there is no point,â€� he explains. “You cannot meditate. You are better off just practicing, working on your breath. Trying to just get your attention on your breath and focus on that until you find a certain amount of calm.  “You can’t ask someone to hold a pose when there is a storm going on.  It could be in a mental sense, as well. You have got to wait for that kind of storm to calm down, and that’s when you meditate.â€� And find the balance that you need.

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